...but what if it hurts?When writing
the poem Crippled Man, I could easily see the
necessity of a broken heart. For some reason, at
that moment, I understood its value.
Years
later now, with my humanness seeping through, I
find myself questioning what once was a clear
truth- what still is a great truth. Oswald
Chambers wrote in My Utmost For His Highest,
"Why shouldn't we go through heartbreaks? If
through a broken heart God can bring His purpose
to pass in this world, then thank Him for
breaking your heart."
Yet
why now do I have these doubts? I sit thinking
about this question only to wonder if these same
types of doubts escaped such great writers as Mr.
Chambers or even King David (of for that matter,
any great writer of the Bible). After penning
something, that at the time, they were sure was a
truth, did they later doubt that same truth?
I'm
almost sure they must have. They were human. They
must have doubted.
I
guess all I can be sure of is that today, at the
moment I write this, I do not have the same
fondness of a broken heart that I had at the time
I wrote Crippled Man.
It
seems to be a miraculous moment when a
pain-rejecting human being actually accepts with
gratitude the immense pain of a broken heart.
It is
if only God can bring on this acceptance with the
aid of His Holy Spirit, instilling the necessary
assurance and acceptance into the heart of a
doubting, hurting and selfish human being. And
yet later, if that same Spirit is neglected,
doubts are sure to enter. Mark Heard, one of our
generations greatest songwriters, sang, "One
day's miracle is another day's rut." I now
understand how this can be.
Oh Lord, please
re-instill in my heart, through Your Holy
Spirit, the ability to accept the
necessary pains of life that have Your
purposes written all over them. Please
help me to remember again- and believe
again with the same fervor- the truths
that You have already taught me. And if
it is Your will and pleasure, please
teach me how to have to learn things only
once. |
After completing this I
found another truth penned by Mr. Chambers that
applies to my prayer. He wrote, "God will
never reveal more truth about Himself until you
have obeyed what you know already." I guess
this is what I need to learn first and
foremost.
copyright 1992 Dale
Suffridge
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